Carolyn Sears caught a glance at her mother during the last drive-by parade the Legacy hosted.
At 59 years old, one woman just wants to see her mom; the solution?
In the midst Wyoming’s reopening process, several aspects of life have been adjusted to allow for socialization and group gatherings, while still adhering to public health guidelines to reduce the spread of COVID-19.
Life for many seniors, however, remains unchanged, particularly for residents at The Legacy Living and Rehabilitation Center.
Legacy Director Jonni Beldon oversees the largest population of vulnerable individuals in Campbell County. During an interview Tuesday, she explained that the Legacy’s main goals at this time are to avoid exposure and prevent transmission of the pandemic. Thus far, they have done so by following guidelines from Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS), Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and the Wyoming Department of Health (WDH), she said.
Carolyn Sears, however, whose mother has lived at Legacy since last September, said that she agreed with the facility’s decision to prioritize COVID-19 prevention when it first broke out in April. They’ve done a good job keeping the residents safe, Sears conceded, and have effectively prevented the spread of COVID-19, despite their reporting that three individuals were experiencing “respiratory symptoms,” at the Legacy.
That was her mentality months ago, but now, she hasn’t seen her mom since the center implemented its no visitor policy at the onset of the pandemic.
Sears understands the Legacy’s adoption of extra precautions, but also wonders if the fear of exposure at this point isn’t outweighed by the “emotional trauma” that her mother and other residents are suffering from the lack of visitors and company of their family.
Sears said that her mother has regressed emotionally, mentally and physically within the last three months.
According to Sears, her mother voluntarily admitted herself to the Legacy last year, due to her fear of falling down alone at her house.
When she moved into Legacy, she lost her Section Eight housing and learned that she did not qualify to live at Primrose, the only other retirement home in Gillette.
Sears claimed that her mother has lost over 10 pounds since the beginning of COVID-19 and has also exhibited symptoms of dementia for the first time in her life.
“She’ll mix up words and phrases or forget people’s names,” Sears explained. “She never did that kind of thing until now.”
Sears said that her mother is one of the strongest women she’s ever met. She was born in 1933 in Germany during World War II and fled the country by hiding in a Jeep. Here, she met her husband and gave birth to Carolyn and her brother.
Years ago, Sears said, after her brother was killed, her mother developed a deep appreciation for her family. Not long after, Sears lost her father to cancer, and suddenly, she was “the only family mom had left.”
Since the tiny family has been unable to unite, Sears said her mother’s emotional health has also hit an all time low.
“She cries every time we talk because she just wants to hug me so bad,” Sears said.
Sears played a voice message that her mother had left for her about a week earlier while Sears was at work and unable to answer her phone.
The message is almost entirely inaudible due to her mother’s heavy breathing between each word. Her mom paused between her attempts at speaking, then finally gave up when words would not come.
As Sears listened to the message, her face went blank and her shoulders slumped.
“I’ve never seen her like this,” she said, pausing it. “I’ve listened to it probably a dozen times, and to be honest, I have no idea what she’s talking about.”
According to both Sears and Beldon, Legacy has attempted to resolve the reported feelings of isolation that several residents have experienced since April.
The facility has hosted several window visits, outdoor visits, video calls and drive-by parades to help the residents cope with loneliness.
Sears explained how these plans could be problematic for residents like her mom who don’t respond well to these types of visits and activities.
“My mom doesn’t understand modern technology,” she said. “Every time we’ve had a window visit or video call, she gets so frustrated and embarrassed that she walks away completely.”
Legacy has also offered outdoor visits in which residents are allowed to speak with their relatives through the chain link fence from six feet apart.
Sears said this wasn’t an option for her mother due to her poor eyesight and loss of hearing, which is impacted by the frequent wind in Campbell County.
Proposing a solution, Sears said she purchased a full hazmat suit online, which she’s offered to take out of the package in the lobby and wear inside to visit her mother.
According to Sears, she asked several employees at the Legacy if such an option was doable.
The employees were all unsure, Sears said, and directed her to their superiors, until the request made it up to Beldon, who Sears said denied her access to see her mom, despite her offer to wear the hazmat suit.
“She said she couldn’t guarantee anything and said that Dr. McMahill will review her for Compassionate Care but, other than that I got nowhere,” she said.
Beldon later explained that Compassionate Care is the only option residents have to see their families at this time, but unfortunately this level of care is reserved for patients nearing death.
“We only allow visitation for those on Compassionate Care because we understand how important it is for the residents to see their family during that part of life.”
Sears went on to say that Beldon’s reaction was especially frustrating for her because she doesn’t think her request is unreasonable.
“I’m not asking to visit multiple times a day while I have a cold,” she said. “I will get screened, wear my suit and do whatever I need to see my mom one more time and give her a hug, so that she can find the strength to keep fighting for just a while longer.”
Beldon was both unable and unwilling to comment on individual patients. However, she did say that the Legacy will be implementing its new COVID-19 “hugging booth,” in which family members wearing full-length gloves can hug their loved ones through a plexiglass shield.
“We hope to open up the hugging booth by the end of this week,” Beldon said. “That depends on the number of cases in the community at that time.”
Sears said that she would try the hugging booth but noted her disappointment in the planned process.
“She needs a hug, a real one,” Sears said. “Not to press her body against plexiglass.”
Meanwhile, Beldon said the Legacy has hosted activities like painting, fishing, BINGO, live entertainers and virtual field trips to occupy the residents who are still under quarantine.
Sears said her mom has participated in some of these events, but not many lately.
“I just hope they keep asking her to join, anyway,” she said.
Sears bounced her leg up and down at City Brew Coffee as she described her fear that her outspoken requests and her mother’s current unhappiness will lead to her eviction.
Thus far, she said some of the directors at Legacy have offered to begin her mother’s discharge process in light of her requests, which for Sears isn’t an option.
“If I had any other options, don’t you think she’d be out of there by now?” Sears said, as she began to prepare for her “long drive” to her home outside of the city.
Due to the lack of options regarding her mother, Sears said she’s spoken with Governor Mark Gordon’s Office, the State Ombudsman and has filed a grievance with Legacy.
“I only have one voice, but I know I’m not the only one I’m speaking up for.”
Beldon disagreed, “We’ve been checking in with our residents and the majority of them understand why we’re doing this,” she said.
“We haven’t had too many complaints about the masks or other regulations.”
The Wyoming Department of Health provides COVID-19 case, variant, death, testing, hospital and vaccine data online. The department also shares information about how the data can be interpreted. COVID-19 safety recommendations are available from the CDC.
